Different, or more of the same?

I can’t tell you if “different, or more of the same” is from the Game of Thrones TV show or one of the [A] Song of Ice and Fire books, but it is a line that Jon Snow tells to Daenerys Targaryen when asked whether or not to use her dragons on Kings Landing.  On one hand, she’d end the war quickly, but on the other, she’d risk burning innocent people.  Was she going to be a different ruler, and keep to her word and “break the wheel,” or was she going to be a replacement to Cersei Lannister, and by association, the Mad King?  Am I actually committing towards writing as a career, or is this another phase of mine?

Before I can properly answer this question, I’ll need to address some important issues.  One, I am no longer that fresh-faced 15-year old that thought he could write a story based on who of his friends were Samurai Showdown characters.  I am also no longer that overly self-conscious 23-year old who couldn’t get past his writer’s block, due to the fact that, he was overly self-conscious.  I am now a world-weary but idealistic 40-year old who served 16 years in the U.S. Air Force, and is ready to make a transition back to the civilian world.  Has military life made me a cynic?  If so, then I do still have what it takes to write?  Maybe it’s no longer so much about writing an epic fantasy novel like I wanted to years ago.  Perhaps I just want to get paid to put words on paper.  It’s that push-pull of my dreamer side and my pragmatist side that seems to distract me towards reaching my goals, writing or otherwise.  It is when I can control all that madness inside my head that I am able to focus all of it into letters, words, sentences, paragraphs, and eventually, essays or stories.

The last thing Queen Olenna Tyrell said to Dany was, “you’re a dragon, be a dragon.”  Let’s keep this comparison going by telling me, “you’re a writer, be a writer.”

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